I started watching the show Parenthood on NBC because my lovely wife Erica had gotten into it. This was a couple years back, and I’m now a fan. The show can be somewhat cliche at times (as can I with my writing, I know), maybe a little bit overly dramatic as well. But it’s a TV show, and it’s really well done. They’ve made me care about these characters, even Jasmine, who I really could have done without when I first started watching.
One of those characters is a middle-school aged boy named Max. Max and his parents are constantly dealing with the challenges (and joys) associated with Asperger’s Syndrome, an “autism spectrum disorder (ASD) that is characterized by significant difficulties in social interaction”, to quote Wikipedia.
I’m no authority on Asperger’s or autism, so I apologize if any of this post reflects my ignorance. But a few nights ago, I saw something in Max’s “difficulties in social interaction” that I found beautifully refreshing. The way his character is portrayed, Max doesn’t have much of a filter, and is often saying these lines that would be typically considered inappropriate. But as I watched Max talk with his mother and grandparents about the changes he was experiencing as puberty was beginning, I began to wonder what could it look like if I could speak more frankly and honestly with people. What if I could remove the veiled, flowery language I sometimes default to, and be more open about fears, struggles, anxieties, etc.? What if instead of answering, “how you doing?” with “fine”, “pretty good” or “doing well”, I could tell people how I’m really doing or how I’m really feeling? Could that not be incredibly helpful, to have a much greater level of authenticity?
Please know, I’m not advocating the removal of filters altogether. There are standards of sensitivity that are in place for good reasons. But I know that I for one would greatly benefit from having more relationships that were characterized by speech as honest and direct as Max Braverman’s.